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Is counseling dangerous to marriages?
By: Patti101
Age: 41, 
7/8/2009 9:45:38 AM

Hello Rhonda:

My husband and I have been having marital problems for the past couple of years. We've each had affairs and have hurt each other tremendously. The good news we still love each other, and want to work on keeping our marriage intact. We have been thinking about going to counseling, but I've been reading some articles on the Relationship 911 website and elsewhere on the internet that indicate that going to a counselor who focuses on individual happiness, rather than being an advocate for the marriage can actually injure the marriage and contribute to a divorce.  Just curious to know your thoughts on this. Are there distinctions between counselors who act as individual counselors versus ones that act as an advocate for marriage?

Reply Posted By: Rhonda Bennett, M.A. - Female, NolensvilleTennessee

Date Posted:
7/8/2009 10:24:19 AM

Rhonda Bennett, M.A.

Because counselors are human beings, we all bring different things to the counseling situation.  ANY marriage counselor should be focused on healing the couple.  If both people in the marriage want to work things out, then any marriage can be saved.

That being said, many people go to marriage counseling because they already know they want out.  Marriage counseling often helps them communicate better while they are going through the divorce process. This is especially helpful when children are involved, and the priority is learning to co-parent without bringing added stress into the children''s lives.

Sometimes it takes a little shopping around to find the right marriage counselor.  But if you and your husband want to get your marriage back on-track, then the right therapist can help you do that.  I wish you the best!



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